When Slugs & snails attack!!

I was in the garden today, out of nowhere a snail got the jump on me, with little time to think I ran for it I was out of salt and in the vicious world of snails and slugs that means your unarmed and vulnerable....   I made it to garden table and chairs, an hour later the chase was still on he was still coming....

That was just fiction, it really didn't go down like that but the snail was real...  

I have been looking at a new sleeping bag for mid season summer use (my winter bag was now in it's new home) and had settled on the snugpak softie 2 expansion (the expansion should give you a clue).  I had just recieved my new sleeping bag and walked into the garden to open it out when I  happened across the snail of which there seem far less in the garden than slugs.

It's been pretty wet and cold this year and I was enjoying working from home sat in the garden over my lunch break I was doing some surfing looking at others reviews of Snugpak gear when I came across a post on Paul Kirtleys blog,  I always found his posts straightforward and commonsense (of those that I have ead) until his post mentions that some slugs bite Whhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat!!!  Terrible memories flooded back of watching a film called Slugs where they had mutated in a toxic dump and made there way into a sleepy American town to eat people in their bedrooms.....  Seriously the film was terrible even then..

The Wolf Slug or Huntsman Slug
defending it's cabbage patch territory

After my head stopped spinning and checking for leaping vampire slugs hungry after the cold winter I did what any sensible outdoors orientated person would do, I hit google (well actually duckduckgo.com) and began my search for the elusive biting slugs.

It turns out slugs do actually bite along with snails, and despite a forum post that talked of the wolf slug that bites and injects you with thousands of babies that hatch out leaving you in excruciating pain (from the forum and my googling it's a fake), they are pretty much harmless, go try nibbling on a local block of flats you will get the idea.

Rubbish I hear you say!!! slugs and snails don't bite!!!  Well here is a video I found of a snail attack on a human:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mG6_aj1s_fY

so indeed it is true that they do have teeth and are dumb enough to try and eat you, they are just not vicious enough to be a problem.  I have woken up to find slugs on my tent many times and now I am wondering if sleeping in a bivvy bag leaves me more vulnerable to that..... I will be keeping mine fully closed even in the future...

For those who have read further some actual facts:

1. Slugs are descended from snails and theoretically gave up their shells in environments without the necessary minerals to build them.
2. The Marbled Cone snail has enough venom in it's barbed bite to kill lots of people but not uk based and it is a sea snail so should be easy to spot in an aqualung.
3. They can carry diseases so listen to your mums advice and wash your hands if you come into contact especially clean out a wound...  Angiostrongylus -  rat lung worm

The best fact of all!!!
 NEWTS EAT SLUGS AND SNAILS !!! YET ANOTHER FANTASTIC REASON TO INVITE ME IN FOR COFFEE AND CAKE IF YOU SEE ME TOURING!!!

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=He1YCGiCPYk